A Catalogue of Malicious Life Advice
Need advice?
Friday, May 18, 2007
DSP: “I promise not to kick your baby. When you're around.”
M: “You better not!”
DSP: “Come on, Uncle DSP wouldn't do that!”
DSP: “Oh listen—are you going to want me to lie about your baby's appearance? Or do you want the truth?”
M: “Umm... I guess it would be nicer to lie?”
DSP: “Ok, just planning ahead. I'd better go ahead and come up with some convincing lies now. ‘That baby is... breathtaking.’”
M: “I'd love to see how you are with your nephew.”
DSP: “My sister gets mad! She's all, There's nothing wrong with Xxxx! His eyes will straighten out!”
M: “!! Maybe you should lie!”
DSP: “He's cross eyed!! I'm sure he will excel at whatever his little heart desires! As long as it doesn't involve depth perception!”
M: “Yes, definitely lie for my baby.”